I've been in limbo for the last month. Okay, for the last 3 or 4 months actually. I've been looking for a job and that hasn't been turning out so great. After filling out dozens upon dozens of applications and typing up more cover letters than I’d care to, I've had about 5 interviews, and two call-backs. I’m a very competitive person who hates losing/failing, so that’s not a very good percentage for me. As a result, I started feeling pretty useless and eventually delved into a bit of a depression.
Once depression set in, I didn't really know what else to do
but play video games. They've always been my safety new when times get tough.
When school work was getting too tough in high school, Final Fantasy was there
to help me escape. In middle school, when bullies made life difficult from the
bus stop to the classroom and back again, I’d look to Banjo and Kazooie for
comfort. Therefore, it’s no surprise that I’d turn to gaming once again when
life gets me down as an adult.
That’s the thing about video games – they never quit on you,
they don’t judge you, and they allow you another world to dive into when the
real world you’re in starts to get the better of you. I used to think this
habit was a bit pathetic when I was younger. When I was younger I was always
concerned about how other people perceived me and I valued their opinions of me
above being and liking myself. This led to me having a poor self-image and
self-respect when I used video games as an escape. But they helped me get
through tough times, so I didn't abandon them, and thankfully so, because I
eventually outgrew that silly idea about needing others’ approval of who I was
to be happy. Who knows what would've happened if I did continue to value the
opinions of random people who didn't really matter, then I wouldn't have video
games to fall back on today when times get tough.
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| I love you, video games...you understand me! |
So as I said, times have been less than stellar for me
lately, and I became a recluse. I stopped tweeting for quite some time, removed
myself from other forms of social media, and rarely left the house except to go
to the occasional interview or social function with friends. The vast majority
of my time was spent playing, what else, video games, and I definitely had the
backlog to support the habit. I played games on a variety of systems, from the
Sega Genesis to the N64 to the Xbox 360, but most of my attention went to the
PS3. This was because the majority of my backlogged games were on Sony’s “last
generation” console, and it was about time I took care of that.
I’m going to try and do a write up for the games I
thoroughly enjoyed, even if they will be shorter in length than my usual style,
but I make no promises. Still, since my last blog post two whole months ago,
here are, in no particular order, the games I've played and on what systems:
- Arkham Asylum (PS3)
- Arkham City (PS3)
- Sly Cooper: Thieves in Time (PS3)
- NHL ’94 (Genesis)
- Mario Party 5 (GCN)
- Mario Kart 64 (N64)
- Super Smash Bros. (N64)
- Viva Piñata: Trouble in Paradise (360)
- Super Mario All-Stars (SNES)
- Resistance 3 (PS3)
- NHL ’15 (360)
- Battleblock Theater (360)
- Fez (PS3)
- Stealth Inc.: A Clone in the Dark (PS3)
- Metro: Last Light (PS3)
- Dead Space 3 (PS3)
- Dynasty Warriors 8 (360)
- Dark Souls (PS3)
- Borderlands 2 (360)
- Hoard (PS3)
- Proteus (PS3)
After compiling that list I’m slightly embarrassed at its
length, especially for just 60 days of gaming. But like I said, I’m unemployed
and have almost nothing but time on my hands. Still, it’s amazing how much
gaming one can accomplish when they’re left to their own devices with limited
distractions. Hell, I was even visiting wedding venues with my fiancé over that
time period so it’s not like I was distraction-free.
However, while this experience was enjoyable, it was rooted
in a need to escape during a rough time in my life. I would rather have been
able to enjoy my gaming without worrying about finances or if I was slowly
creeping towards uselessness. I wish that I could have the freedom to play
copious amounts of games without the added burden of worrying about paying rent
or feelings that my college degrees are just useless pieces of paper. But until
the day comes that I win the lottery, I guess it’s nice to know that regardless
of whether I’m gainfully employed or can’t land an interview to save my life,
video games will continue to be a rock I can cling to and pretend everything
will be okay.
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| It's only with 10 Gamerscore Points - not worth it. |
